What ties you up?

This journey to losing weight is starting to get really interesting.I recently had another moment of perfect clarity.I have spoken about death and the connection obesity has to death.I have come to realize I am holding myself back from success at weight loss.By that I mean I am also worried about my husband and the fact that he is over weight also.A healthy reasonable weight for myself is 165 as I am 5'9".A healthy weight for my husband is 185 as he is 6'2".We are both 46 years old.I eat meat maybe twice a week.He eats meat every meal.I eat lean,healthy prepared meat.He eats fried fatty greasy meat if I let him cook it.We both eat salads and fruit,me more than he.We both drink lots of water.I also drink unsweetened tea and he is a coffee fiend.I recently developed a severe near deadly allergy to almost all types of coffee with the exception of Seattle's Best.So I have given up coffee.He eats lots of vending machine salty processed foods at work.Not me ever!My issue is this,I am afraid of him dying and me being left alone the way my mother was when my dad died from a quadruple heart attack at the age of 56.Just 10 years older than Randy and I.I am determined to continue to lose weight.I am equally determined to encourage my husband Randy any way I can to eat healthier and to lose some weight also.How can I live with myself if I don't?Now that I am doing what I know to be right for me it's up to Randy.By the way I can now get a tape measure around my waist.I now have a 60 inch waist.